The Twitter Types

  • The What Abouter
    Now show Japan
  • The Just So You Knower
    I didn’t like this (post, tweet, take, etc)
  • The Philosopher
    This is what happens when Socrates meets Silicon Valley
  • The Burner
    Kevin Durant
  • The Lurker
    Jerome Powell
  • The Ratio(e)
    This person gets dunked on more than Shawn Bradley
  • The Blocker
    Look at this person wrong and they will block you
  • The Sub Tweeter
    If you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all  say something without @’ing them
  • The Martian
    Responses never make any sense, it’s like they’re from outer space
  • The Liker
    This person likes 90% of your tweets
  • The Interrupter
    Like a child who wanders into the middle of a movie
  • The Deleter
    This person experiences 30 seconds of pure anxiety after every tweet. If it gets traction it stays, if not it gets deleted
  • The GIFer
    Love you, Jim
  • The Memer
    Love you, Ramp
  • The Actuallier
    Love you, Jake
  • The Complainer
    Ugh, United, my flight has been delayed for THREE AND A HALF HOURS
  • The Humble Bragger
    I’m having a tough year, which happens. Now beating the market by just 35% over the last three years. Damnit. 
  • The Back Patter
    8 out of 10 tweets are “great post man!”
  • The Link Sharer
    It’s nothing but links from 5 in the morning to 10 at night
  • The Manual Retweeter
    Twitter killed RT @. For some users, old habits die hard
  • The Quote Tweeter
    The quote tweet has its place, but in conversations is not one of those places. Just hit reply like a normal person
  • The Stealer
    This person steals tweets without attribution
  • The Outrager
    Always mad about everything
  • The Doomer
    The glass is always half shattered
  • The Introducer
    “Hey, you two should connect”
  • The Bat Signal(e)
    Whether it’s buybacks or Buffett, this person will enter every single conversation when you mention their bat signal. 

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